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lostwolfe.
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[inequality one:humans]
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[21:19:43]
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I was eating sheep when the void arrived in my dining-room.
there I was, alone, the plate of food in front of me and
then there was...well...a void...or a gate.
instead of aliens stepping from the gate there were two
dogs....but the dogs were huge. at least, they were
human-sized dogs. I wasn't sure of how they knew English,
but they did and they escorted me from my meal of sheep
and wine into the land of the unknown.
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[inequality two:the food chain]
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I’d been here for an indeterminate amount of time, but it
was quite pleasant...in a way. I’m not sure of how to
describe it. if I say it was prison, I’d be wrong, but
if I say it was anything but, I’d be wrong again. there
*were* guards as such, but the guards didn't really impede
our progress, they just made sure that we never went
places we weren't meant to go. the guards weren't very
dissimilar from the dogs who came to fetch me to this
place. by now I was quite used to their large size...
they didn't quite dwarf me, [at six foot and three hundred
and fifty pounds it's a bit difficult to do.] but it had
been a little disturbing at first to stare right into the
eyes of a dog every time they came around to escort me to
the outside.
on the outside there were other humans...about twenty or
so, in fact...and all of them looked something like me
with shades in between. men who'd run to excess. it
was a little odd, since there were no lithe, little
men anywhere. on the first few days of my arrival I did
try to get some kind of answer out of the others, but they
knew just as little as I did...the only forthcoming
information was that they'd all been taken in fairly
private moments. what was strange, to me, at least, was
the lack of resistance that all of had in coming here. I
hadn't put up a struggle and to my knowledge, neither had
any of the others.
but...every day that I stayed here I worried more and more,
worried about what exactly was going on...worried about
my business, worried about the world I’d been escorted out
of.
every day we were fed, but it was supper that was generally
the good meal. there would be meat, vegetables, potatoes,
the kind of thing I would have eaten at home. I didn't
really notice it at first, but after about the second or
third week it was hard to miss. the good food was putting
additional layers around my middle...taking my weight from
the stable three hundred and fifty pounds that I’d been for
the last ten years or so and adding maybe fifteen pounds.
asking the guard-dogs what was in the food didn't produce
results and none of the other men knew either. they just
knew that they were putting on weight. one night, out of
curiosity, I sent my food back, uneaten. no fuss, the
next morning's food arrived without a trace of the last
night's meal. for a few days I kept sending the evening
meal back...until I noticed that I was still putting on
weight.
it was about a week into this experiment that one of our
number mysteriously vanished and never returned. one
morning we were sitting around waiting for peter...no
show. he couldn't possibly have found a way back to the
world he'd been escorted from...or had he? we discussed
it, but...it didn't make any sense. maybe the guards [or
our captors, as I’d started calling them] had escorted
him somewhere else? that was the only rational response
I could think of...
peter never returned, but a new man showed up the
following morning to complete the compliment of twenty
men. like me, when I arrived, he was full of questions...
but he could find no answers.
I had, for three successive days now, not eaten a thing
and hunger pangs were filling me up from the inside. I
wasn't sure if this was going to lead to an answer or not,
but I did notice that my weight [as such that it could be
determined] stayed steady. it was on the fourth day that
the guards presented me with the largest meal I’d ever
seen...somehow, remembering to fight the urge to eat, I
sent it back. I didn't know what was going on, but I did
know that the food was tied to it and that if I didn't eat
the food I might find out what was going on. maybe I could
even explain to the others.
the night I’d sent their big meal back was the night they
took me away...I knew I wouldn't return, whatever happened,
since Pete had gone and never come back. after three days
of eating I wasn't in any state to argue with the two large
dogs who escorted me through the maze of tunnels to
somewhere I’d never seen before. odd how they didn't cover
my eyes. if they didn't want their captives to know what
was becoming of them they were doing an extremely bad job.
they led me through a door and on...for the first time
since I was here I saw another outdoors...the outdoors
that belonged to our captors. it reminded me a great deal
of every other human outdoors I’d seen...there were cars
and drum-fires in alley-ways, there were no stars in the
evening sky...and I was being escorted, naked [my clothes
had long stopped fitting] through the streets of this
Babylon...this Babylon of animals. the quick glimpse of
the city that I saw confirmed this. there was not a
human in sight. on a street corner there were cats...
man-sized cats...which I presume were the ladies of the
night, there were hobos of all descriptions [a goat,
pushing a trolley from one end of the road to another
as he peered into the windows of restaurants, watching
some of the most beautiful animals I’d ever seen tuck in
to meals he'd never be able to afford.] and horses...
beautiful pedigreed horses in dress suits, waiting for
tables in those same restaurants.
[16 January 1999]
this world was the reverse of ours. maybe their servants
were human? from the quick glimpse that I got of that
outdoors it wasn't possible.
it was strange...as we were walking along one of the cats
turned her head in our direction and yelled, for all the
world to hear "hey, Charlie, you got yourself one fat
sheep there..."
sheep?
none of this made sense. surely she must know that I am
human? the dogs didn't say a word, instead they just kept
escorting me down an alley-way and into an almost-invisible
back door.
stepping from the alley-way and into this was a bizarre
experience, because, for the first time in a long while I
was surrounded by more than two...animals all at once.
it didn't make sense...we'd stepped directly from the
alley-way and into a kitchen?
I didn't want to think about it, but the smells wafting
from the serving-trays were good...this was not a cheap
restaurant. whatever else it was.
some of these dishes they'd 'borrowed' from our culture,
but some were completely foreign. things I’d never seen
before...and the meat was something I’d never smelt before.
it was sweet...almost like pig, but not quite.
that was about the point that they pinned my arms and legs
together and put me onto what appeared to be a very large
serving tray.
not having eaten in three days it was a little difficult
to argue with them...quite suddenly the pig-smell made
sense.
as I struggled, ineffectually, to free myself from the
vice-like grip of the two dogs, a large black panther
wondered over to me and ran some kind of electronic
instrument over my body...now...even if I wanted to, I
couldn't struggle. it was as if all of my motor-neurons
terminated dead. I could feel, but not move. I tried
screaming, but all that came out were hoarse grunts...
animal appeals at freedom.
around me a salad began to appear, tomatoes, lettuce
leaves, onions...it didn't take the pair of zebras who
were building the salad terribly long to finish up.
the one thing I couldn't understand was the codpiece
that they put over me...but when the bulldogs picked
me up and I realized that I was moving towards another
destination I understood, because I soiled the codpiece.
fear was eating me up from the inside and I couldn't do
a thing. the tones around me changed as I was taken
from the kitchen and into the restaurant proper...and
still I was grunting, pleading for freedom.
when I was put down in front of the great lion I knew
I’d come to rest...and I broke down as far as I could...
tears flowed freely as I looked up into the hungry eyes
of the animal I had been put before.
I couldn't believe his size...he was to me what I had
been to other people. mammoth.
grinning, he put a claw to one of my arms and drew it
down, almost erotically.
"ah." the rumble sounded enormous. "sheep."
around him the rest of the back-room of the restaurant
went silent, waiting for their guests approval. beyond
my own fear I could feel the worry of the kitchen staff.
pleased, he waved the waiter away...and with him went
everyone else in the room. this was his special meal...
however he'd arranged it.
his grin didn't fade as he reached across me to fetch
his glass of wine.
snarling a little before he took his first sip of the
evening his voice boomed back down at me.
"little sheep, little sheep, why not bleat?" he
paused...took a sip and continued with what appeared
to be a recitation for my edification. "oh, I suppose
you don't bleat because you are meat. and meat isn't
supposed to make a sound."
slamming the wine-glass down his snarl turned to a
growl. "is that not so?"
he turned away from me for a few seconds.
"waiter!"
there was almost no pause as one of the zebras slammed
through the kitchen door and almost appeared at his side.
"two things, please. a wet cloth so that I can clean
him off. oh...and get Samuel back in here, I want him to
restore movement to the sheep."
the zebra nodded, dumbly, "yes, sir."
"quickly."
the zebra scampered off and returned seconds later with
the absolutely black panther trailing him. removing the
codpiece, the zebra cleaned up as best as he could, making
a hasty retreat as the panther stood over me and waved his
wand again.
this one was not afraid of the lion. smiling, as if a
co-conspirator, he flicked his tail and purred, gently,
"enjoy, Leo."
apt.
without thinking about it, the delayed screams began to
tumble from my mouth as the panther turned and sauntered
back into the kitchen...as the door swung shut I could see
several of the staff with their hands over their heads.
didn't want to hear, I suppose.
picking up his wine glass again he peered down at me.
"now. I wonder. I’m pretty sure you know what's going on
around here now, but I’m sure you don't know why."
swilling the glass over me, he spilt a little of the wine
over my belly.
when my skin involuntarily crawled I realized that I could
move again. as he'd ordered, Samuel had restored movement
to me.
"don't just lie there. I’m sure you want to get away," he
taunted.
I sat up and judged the distance from here to the kitchen
door. it wasn't far away...the room wasn't very large.
he grinned broadly and sat back, crossing his large paws
over his vast gut as I scampered off of the serving tray
and ran for the kitchen door. it didn't slam open as it
had when the zebra had come running. it was locked.
presumably from the kitchen side.
"no, no, no," he smiled, then pointed. "why not try that
door?"
squinting in the almost-darkness I saw the door he was
referring to. a door I could have sworn hadn't been
there a moment ago...or maybe my eyes hadn't adjusted to
the darkness enough to see it.
I slumped down...that door was probably locked too.
my suspicions were confirmed when he absently put the
wine-glass back onto the table and reached into his
over-coat to pull out the key.
"how about if you come back here and sit across me like
a gentleman and you explain your actions. your fattening
of the sheep. maybe I’ll let you go?"
the hungry glint in his eye made it plain that he was
going to do no such thing, but it was the only hope I had
and I had to grasp that only hope with both hands.
besides, my adrenaline and fear had run out...there wasn't
much else I could do, so, getting up from the floor, I sat
down on the only other chair in the room and watched as he
lay even further back into his comfortable chair, put his
hands behind his vast mane and waited.
"it..." I began, but realized, no matter what way I went,
it'd just sound disgusting to this...animal.
so I thought about it a little...he was certainly in a
high-ranking business position of some sort. logic would
appeal to him, so, using the best of my lawyer skills I
tried to make the entire premise seem as...rational as
possible.
"everything has to eat," I started, again. he nodded,
sagely, a paw absently stroking his gut.
after that the argument ran out...there was no better way
of putting how the whole thing had come to be.
"I...well...I had the money to ask a friend of mine if he
wouldn't do me the favor of keeping maybe two or three of
his sheep for me. to feed them non-chemical food...fatten
them, I suppose." I was becoming unstuck, unsure. I was
the one who had single-handedly argued my way up the
corporate ladder and here I was, unable to account for a
simple thing like eating meat.
stumbling over the words I continued the argument to its
conclusion. "meat is...part of a balanced diet, it's one
of the major food-groups...one can't *not* eat meat..."
I didn't understand why, but I was blushing. the fear
was edging its way back into my belly.
"I got to a point where I could just afford to do that sort
of thing. I..." the words were running out of my mouth
now in a desperate attempt to make him see. so far he
hadn't said a word. odd how I’d begun to think of this
animal as a he. as a person.
"I could and therefore I did."
he smiled then.
"that's the crux of it, isn't it? you could and so you
did."
in all this time his paw was still circling his belly in
lazy arcs. "well," he boomed, good-naturedly, "it would
seem that you and I have things in common," he laughed.
that laugh scared me.
"I appreciate a good meal...and a good meal seems to have
been placed before me, don't you think?"
with that he stood and removed his jacket...rolling up
his sleeves to display vast arms.
he grinned as I shrunk back into my chair, watching as a
claw raked it's way, slowly down my stomach.
"soft. very tender. do you know...no, I suppose you
don't, but...here's a trick question."
I waited as his claw pressed into my belly-button.
"they fed you potatoes...oh and beans and peas...and all
of those really *good* things. really *wholesome* things,
but cooked in such a way that they weren't healthy.
they also fed you meat. cooked meat."
he grinned and his leonine face was inches from my human
one.
"do you know what that meat was?"
he grinned and waited as I drew my own conclusions.
"oh yes, yes, yes," he said, as the glimmer of
comprehension trickled into my mind. then he roared.
"the meat was sheep. *human* sheep."
I gagged then. he'd seen this whole performance time and
again...he watched as I leaned forward and hastily pulled
the serving tray towards myself...watched as the
serving-tray clattered to the floor and I knelt over it,
the contents of my stomach heaving out of me and onto the
salad...he saw one of the tomatoes roll off into a distant
corner of the room.
"just like you force-feed pigs. force-feed turkeys.
you...*humans*" the word was spat at me, "you *civilized*
beings who prey on the lesser because they are yours for
the taking."
he roared as he picked me up...two huge paws wrapped around
my middle as he stood with me...holding me in the air like
a rag-doll.
"who...gave...you...the...right?"
the words stammered out of me, "g-g-god did."
"no. god gave you the right to take what you needed," he
started, quietly. "god gave you the right to be just and
swift. god never gave you the right to fatten a turkey to
the point where it felt like all it wanted to do was
explode. god never gave you the right to force-feed pigs
to the point of immobility so that all they could do was
wallow in their own shit and piss. and god certainly did
not give you the right to fatten those sheep."
he grinned, "but I think you've learned your lesson. I
think you know what it's like to be led to pasture. to
wonder from day-to-day where one of your number has gone.
peter. isn't that it. his name was peter? wasn't it?"
his badgering was driving me back to tears.
"oh...peter was a magnificent fighter. fought right up to
the end. it was...fulfilling to feel him try to claw his
way out of my stomach. I think I sat in that chair over
there for...must have been half-an-hour, feeling his
struggles."
it was then that I began to notice the bulge in his pants.
bigger than any human penis I would ever know. he...
eroticized his meals.
"peter gave up his right to be a predator the instant he
desecrated his prey."
his eyes glinted. "I had him just like he had the roast
chicken he'd poured his come into. I fucked him until he
was raw. split him wide open."
he lifted me up to his gaping mouth.
"I’ve done what I set out to do. I’ve made you feel like
a sheep and now I shall dine on you as you dined on your
own meals..."
a broad tongue lazily flowed from his mouth and began to
caress my penis below my gut...
"oh...plea-"
"no begging. your roast sheep couldn't beg. you're not
getting the opportunity either."
with that he simply shifted his mouth up to my head and
popped it right into his gaping maw.
slowly, as if caressing a lover, he ran his paws
appreciatively up and down my sides, feeling the weight of
my stomach as gravity tugged at it. I didn't so much hear
his animal grunts of pleasure as I felt them rumbling up
from his throat. I felt his tongue slip around my neck
and caress it...licking the salty residue of the sweat that
had poured out of me. he murmured and made satisfied
grunts as the top half of my shoulders entered his mouth.
inside of him I tried screaming...to my horror I found that
I could...but that the screams were too loud and too
agonizing for even me to bear, so instead I started
whimpering. a huge paw slapped my behind, painfully, as if
to tell me to stop, but...I couldn't. there was no
rationality driving my body anymore, just sheer terror.
pushing and kicking, I tried to fight my way back out of
his mouth, but he was infinitely stronger and simply shoved
me from behind so that my nipples were inside his jaws.
I didn't need to see his face to know that he was grinning
as he began to twist my nipples with his supple tongue.
then my belly made it's way into his mouth as my head and
shoulders began to slip deeper into his throat. right
now I could hear his heart and all the little noises of
his body doing it's work to cope with the sudden load of
incoming food. his tongue began to caress my soft sides
as my legs kicked out the back of his mouth. it must have
looked odd from the outside, but I didn't know if anyone
could see.
one huge paw squeezed at my behind even as the other
paw made it's way down and around my waist to where my
penis was limply dangling. stroking, quite gently, he
managed to get my bodies attention...while his throat
muscles pulled me down...and down...and down...now his
tongue was coating the fur on my belly...and now it was
wrapping itself around my erect member. then he did
something I wasn't quite ready for. instead of just
squeezing my behind, a large digit entered it. he'd
retracted his nails for this, but it still hurt because
of the force with which he did it.
on one hand there was his incredible suction from his
tongue and on the other end there was this incredible
push from his finger. I think I must have completely
lost all negative-feedback responses at that point because
without thinking about it, I simply flooded his mouth with
a warm coating of semen...shuddering as I did so.
now I was well past exhausted...I was just limp. I was
his to do with as he pleased...and somehow, I didn't quite
think he was going to let me back out of his mouth once
he'd got me to this point in the swallowing process.
I was proved correct when he sucked and took my body in
up to my knees.
by now my belly was in his throat and my head was just
about entering his gut. I couldn't even whimper anymore,
I’d simply lost all will to do anything.
done with his pleasure he swallowed again, drawing my feet
into his mouth...I could feel the cold air outside his
mouth contrast with the warm...almost foul air of his
stomach.
it wasn't entirely unpleasant...just dark and wet and
warm. outside his mouth my toes were treated to a quick
once over by his tongue and then they too disappeared
into the maw...
for a few quick seconds he held me there as he licked his
mouth and then swallowed.
I found myself careering, in one foul swoop from his throat
and into his gut...which had distended to a point where it
could hold all of me.
right up above me the tract that lead from his throat to
his enormous stomach closed and I was sealed in. he
thumped his now enormous belly a few times and then I
felt him shuffle and sit at his chair.
he must have tossed his bow-tie onto the table in front
of him and undone his shirt, because I could feel him
rock back and forth...as if he were masturbating.
for a while...a long while it would seem, he sat there,
alternating fast strokes with slow strokes until, finally
the rocking around me stopped...and his body was still.
for a long while he just lay there in his easy-chair,
pawing at the extra layer of fat that had accumulated
around his middle and drinking wine...
I felt the belly around me expand and then contract as
he sighed, lazily got out of his easy-chair and moved.
it didn't seem like a long walk before he was lying down
again...possibly a bed...or a couch...but I heard it
when his body began to slow down...to shut down for the
nights rest...and I certainly felt it as the first pangs
of gastric juices assaulted my body...
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[equality]
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[21:19:44]
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a knife. a fork. a plate of steaming sheep-meat. some
wine...and sitting on the chair at the table a skeleton.
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[date of completion:17 January 1999] |
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